(Inspired by a recent post by feminally)
Feminism is not easy. We immerse ourselves in the negativity, the ignorance and prejudice that pervade our culture. We witness daily the homophobia, transphobia, racism, misogyny, and xenophobia. We’re nearly masochistic in our quest…
1:37 pm • 30 November 2010 • 96 notes
“The fact that anyone can be labeled a slut, at any time, with any level of sexual activity under their belt, and the fact that sluttiness is a moving target, makes it clear that slut-shaming isn’t just about controlling how much sex women have. If you can be called a slut without so much as kissing another person, then it stands to reason that your slut status must be based on something besides your level of sexual experience or activity. And often, it is. It’s based on what people assume about you just by looking at you - at your body, your clothes and the way you move through the world. Once you realize that, it becomes obvious that the slut label isn’t just about controlling how much sex women have: It’s about controlling how we dress, how we walk, how we talk, how we dance, how much we drink, who we talk to, how we feel about our own desires and so on and so on. And crossing the invisible, culturally-determined “slut line” in any of these arenas is enough to earn you a label that, no matter how much we denounce and detest it, no matter how well we understand its purpose and its perniciousness, somehow manages to seep into our brains and eat away at our certainty and self-assurance.”
from ‘slut panel’ postmortem: “shame, shame, go away” on feministing. the whole piece is very good, but this section was especially good. (via 63words) (via skirtonfire) (via definatalie) (via drugz) (via xdny) (via albinwonderland) (via bettychantel) (via thefeeloffree) (via dancingonembers) (via so-treu) (via lipsbetweenthehips) (via lackofcreativity) (via socalfeminist) (via fuckyeahfeminists)
Never say slut.
11:10 pm • 23 December 2010 • 3,276 notes
“What is abundantly clear is that ending discrimination against women will require no less than a total transformation of society at every level: international, national, local, and individual. This will involve campaigning not only for new legislation and better policies, but also challenging cultures, practices and, perhaps most difficult of all, ourselves. That means unlearning old habits, questioning long-held assumptions, and rethinking our actions.”
— The Equality Illusion, Kat Banyard
7:42 pm • 27 January 2011 • 7 notes
Trying to be a Better Feminist
Things I’m trying to incorporate into my life…
- stop buying fashion/”women’s” magazines (so far, so good)
- don’t use words like “slut”, “whore” or any type of sex negative term (I’m usually pretty good about this, sometimes I slip)
- don’t say “that/you/this sucks” because this is homophobic (although this is really difficult, because I find alternatives sound so phoney - although it’s just like learning to not say “that’s so gay” and I’m at the point where I never say that anymore)
- don’t implicitly value feminine traits less than masculine traits (very me in high school)
- stand up for myself, my friends, women everywhere
3:48 pm • 28 January 2011
“Our findings demonstrate that sexist humor is not simply benign amusement. For men who have sexist attitudes it can create a perceived social norm of tolerance of discrimination against women, and as a result, increase personal tolerance of discrimination against women and even increase willingness to engage in sexist behavior without fears of disapproval.”
— Humor Research « Social Psychology Lab (via petitefeministe)
5:34 pm • 5 February 2011 • 1,326 notes
How Many Fucking Arguments Did I Have in High School Like This
First I am going to say that I am not being “offensive” and that if you read it as offensive, there is something wrong with you.
Next, I am going to jump head first into a racist/sexist/homophobic/transphobic rant. I will refer to groups as “those people” or “others.” I will minimize their concerns while also implying that they’re just too dimwitted to get the brilliance of my argument. I’ll rely on ideals of America, Freedom, and Justice and I will not acknowledge that these ideals are, by and large, available in full only to white, cis males.
Then I am going to make this even more all about me. I’ll talk about how I can’t be racist/sexist/homophobic/transphobic because I have a friend who is a person of color/a woman/an individual who identifies with a QUILTBAG label/a trans person. I’ll say that if you question me, then you’re really the one who is racist/sexist/homophobic/transphobic and I’ll call upon a logical fallacy to back me up.
Finally, I’ll tell people not to reblog or to publicly discuss my argument. If I see that my argument does not hold water and/or that many, many people disagree, I will delete the post and act like you all just didn’t get it.
Let’s keep it civil, even though I refuse to acknowledge you as my equal!
9:28 pm • 8 February 2011 • 2 notes
Every little girl deserves feminism. It will make her sad, it will make her angry, probably frustrated and at times, overwhelmed. But it will be the greatest gift she will ever receive, because she will understand the world in a fundamentally more advanced manner, and this will help her avoid the pitfalls that her peers will fall into as they try and make themselves fit the gender role society assigns them, in a desperate belief it will make them happy, only to discover the damning double standard no matter what they do.
I wish I had discovered feminism much earlier. But honestly, its hard to find. To me, feminism is a reactionary ideology. It reacts to the presence of whatever you’d like to call it, the patriarchy or gendered structures, or anything that leads to the systematic devaluation of women. Which is precisely why it’s still necessary in 2011. If society was equal for all, feminism would disappear. There would be nothing to react against. I, for one, would not be angry. And my anger is what fuels my feminist beliefs.
But that isn’t all. Unless you know what to look for, it can be difficult to see the more subtle manifestations of making women second class citizens. To most people, the discrimination against women is practically negligible. It’s a tiny ice cube floating in an ocean of much more pressing issues, like poverty, climate change, the economy, terrorism, healthcare. They fail to recognize that the tiny ice cube is actually the tip of a massive iceberg. To those who navigate their ships far, far away from the disgusting ice cube of feminism, they avoid confronting the issues beneath the surface. As a woman, however, growing up in a politically and religiously conservative climate, I instinctively felt something was amiss. And so I decided to steer towards the waters surrounding feminism, never intending to actually take on the label. And of course, once I got too close, I crashed headfirst into a paradigm too formidable to ignore. I began to see patterns and interpret the world as never before, and suddenly the world made sense to me. Not that the world was the way it should be, but I understood that the current order was extremely advantageous for a small group of people, and it paid to maintain it. Going back to those ‘much more pressing issues’, I see how the subordination of women is actually so integrated with those problems, and that the elevation of women in society (by giving them more education, more status, access to contraceptives, improving diversity in the workforce, better daycare options) would actually be part of the solution to these Much More Important Problems.
Feminism is real. It has a purpose. It is not dead. Just because the ‘macro’ issues like giving women the right to vote and legislating fair pay are over (although despite legislation, women still earn less for the same work) doesn’t mean that the micro issues are taken care of. To use one last metaphor, everyone cares about an ecosystem being destroyed when someone decries the endangered polar bear, tiger, blue whale. But when someone tries to call attention to the equally endangered plight of an insect, a particularly dull coloured bird, or a worm, no one opens up their pocketbooks. And yet those less visible aspects of the ecosystem are just as important as the predator at the top, if not more so.
I hate hearing from people that feminism is obsolete. I see sexism and misogyny every day. Of course, I know what to look for and sometimes actively seek it out. But it really is hidden in plain view. It’s just so taken for granted that people think its normal. When will it be finished? I don’t really know for sure, but I have a feeling it won’t be for a while.
7:31 pm • 9 March 2011
“Not only does feminism give woman a voice, but it also clears the way for men to free themselves from the stranglehold of traditional masculinity.”
— Byron Hurt (via petitefeministe)
11:25 am • 19 March 2011 • 62 notes
“The problem with sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, classist, ableist, etc., remarks and ‘jokes’ is not that they’re offensive, but that by relying for their meaning on harmful cultural narratives about privileged and marginalized groups they reinforce those narratives, and the stronger those narratives are, the stronger the implicit biases with which people are indoctrinated are. That’s real harm, not just ‘offense.’”
— I Don’t Care If You’re Offended by Scott Madin (via petitefeministe)
(Source: senhoritaugly, via petitefeministe-deactivated2013)
4:46 pm • 25 March 2011 • 666 notes
“Feminism is an entire world view or gestalt, not just a laundry list of women’s issues.”
— Charlotte Bunch (via feminismmm)
10:43 pm • 30 March 2011 • 5 notes
“For women, getting angry is socially unacceptable, even when the anger is over violence, discrimination, misogyny, and other forms of oppression. Anger is unacceptable because angry women are women in touch with their passion and power, especially in relation to men, which threatens the entire patriarchal order. It’s unacceptable because it forces men to confront the reality of male privilege and women’s oppression and their involvement in it, even if only as passive beneficiaries. Women’s anger challenges men to acknowledge attempts to trivialize oppression with “I was only kidding.” And women’s anger is unacceptable to men who look to women to take care of them, to prop up their need to feel in control, and to support them in their competition with other men. When women are less than gracious and good-humored about their own oppression, men often feel uncomfortable, embarassed, at a loss, and therefore vulnerable.”
— Allan G. Johnson (via fuckyeahradicalquotes)
3:35 pm • 9 April 2011 • 5,325 notes
“Feminism has fought no wars. It has killed no opponents. It has set up no concentration camps, starved no enemies, practiced no cruelties. Its battles have been for education, for the vote, for better working conditions.. for safety on the streets… for child care, for social welfare… for rape crisis centers, women’s refuges, reforms in the law. If someone says ‘Oh, I’m not a feminist,’ I ask ‘Why? What’s your problem?’”
— Dale Spender (via feministblackboard)
8:11 pm • 15 April 2011 • 95 notes
“From an early age, boys are fitted with emotional straight-jackets tailored by a restricted code of behavior that falsely defines masculinity. In the context of “stop crying,” “stop those emotions,” and “don’t be a sissy,” we define what it means to “Be a Man!” Adherence to this “boy code” leaves many men dissociated from their feelings and incapable of accessing, naming, sharing, or accepting many of their emotions. When men don’t understand their own emotions it becomes impossible to understand the feelings of another. This creates an “empathy-deficit disorder” that is foundational to America’s epidemic of bullying, dating abuse and gender violence. Boys are taught to be tough, independent, distrusting of other males, and at all cost to avoid anything considered feminine for fear of being associated with women. This leads many men to renounce their common humanity with women so as to experience an emotional disconnect from them. Women often become objects, used to either validate masculine insecurity or satisfy physical needs. When the validation and satisfaction ends, or is infused with anger, control or alcohol, gender violence is often the result.”
—Joe Ehrmann, from “Men Can Stop Rape”
(Source: epharoe, via thenegrotude)
8:05 pm • 27 May 2011 • 6,973 notes